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Category: How To Widow; A guide to anew normal

Misconceptions about Widowhood / by Rachelle

    In my vast experience as a widow J – I have come to realise that there are a few common misconceptions people have about a person who lost her husband.  Let me clear these up for you quickly…   1.        I lost my husband, not my mind.  I can still think for myself.  […]

How To Widow; A guide to anew normal

El Alamein…the real story! by Rachelle

Alone… Not lonely. Just alone. This week started off with the worst Monday in human history, my own El Alamein – my strongholds stormed! Now there was a battle I could get behind, and it felt like that, believe me! On Monday I wanted to do a favour for a friend who has been so […]

How To Widow; A guide to anew normal

“Mann Tracht, Un Gott Lacht” Yiddish adage meaning Man plans and God laughs by Rachelle

Today marks the 2 month Sadiversary of your death. The first time I have actually written that – like that. I have been wondering about this week’s edition of this blog, it’s a sad time. A hard, sad time. It’s becoming more real every day. I look at the wall, at the pictures and I […]

How To Widow; A guide to anew normal

Human Angels and struggle songs by Rachelle

I have been wanting to write about my friend Hester, my human angel, for a long time, but due to the sensitivity of the “project,” and my hand on the heart promise, I have not been able to tell anyone about the one thing that saved my sanity during the last couple of weeks. Hester […]

How To Widow; A guide to anew normal

Comms – Commendations and medals…. How to Widow – a guide to a new normal

It’s weird how, when certain things happen, or doesn’t happen like they used to, I miss you more. I talk to you every day. Our fights are magnificent, some would even call them spectacular. I am so angry at you for leaving me, but I am angrier at God. I really am. My why’s are […]

How To Widow; A guide to anew normal

Of remembering basics…

I have the great blessing of two alcoholic parents. Mom, Dad, for the purposes of this post I really hope you don’t mind me doing this. This morning, 18-9-18, I had an epiphany! Losing Johan is feeling a lot like those early days after my parents stopped drinking – now 39 years ago, when I […]

How To Widow; A guide to anew normal

Fake it till you make it… How to Widow – A guide to a new normal

So today is the one month anniversary of the death of my Beloved. I have been through more Urbanol today than in all the days preceding and I am not even scared to say it. I am a wreck. There are those in the know, however, who seems to feel that my “little situation” is […]

How To Widow; A guide to anew normal

Of Birthdays and other special days… by Rachelle

Right from the beginning I was warned that special days, Birthday and Anniversaries etc., would be difficult to deal with. Harder than most. So, I put this to the test on Friday – 31 August 2018. What would have been Johan’s 57th birthday and something that was always celebrated to the max in our house. […]

How To Widow; A guide to anew normal

It hurts – by Rachelle from How To Widow

It really hurts like a bitch. Today one week ago I sent my beautiful man off in a coffin to be cremated. My friend, my soulmate, my lover, the father of my beautiful children. My sparring partner, my drinking partner, my giggling partner (the naughtiest giggle ever). My confidant. My life. Yes, I sound teary […]

How To Widow; A guide to anew normal