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I’ll hold them and then hand them back …..by Kay



 

Due to an increase in pregnancies in the circles I move in I find I cannot stop thinking about pregnancy, being pregnant, babies and more! AND NO, I am so not planning on being pregnant in the near future, that option has gone and left the building with a quick snip-snip procedure for hubby.

Nevertheless, I am currently surrounded by pregnant women and even one soon to happen adoption. A mother from a boy in my class recently had her baby, another one is expecting one in December, my sister is having a baby in the first week of September and to crown it all one of my besties are having her first baba at age 41 close to the girl-child’s birthdate. Her pregnancy is the one I am probably most excited about as the others all already had babies before barring the adoptive couple which is just as exciting but having the bestie pregnant is the best. Especially when mine are big enough not to be too jealous when mom will want to spend hours on end playing with the new babies.

It got me thinking about when I was pregnant with my two years ago. It does feel like a millennium ago now as they are approaching ages 18 and 16 way too fast.

I realized with a shock that I had my first baby in the previous millennium as the girl-child was born in December 1999 just before we clicked into the 2000’s. That does feel like eons ago. I mean the nineties was such a different time to know. I was a very young 23 years old when I had my daughter and barely two years later my son.

I don’t remember such a fuss being made about being pregnant or maybe I was either too young and dumb or I just totally missed the boat on all the exciting stuff. I don’t however remember things like baby wraps, wipe warmers, 3D scans, belly painting, specialized baby goods, too many things to name here.

I just remember being pregnant, getting fat whilst eating for two, sore breasts and not sleeping much. I had the prerequisite gynae visits with the standard black and white baby scan pics, never even bought proper maternity wear, never remembered to take proper photos during the pregnancy so very little to no proof that I was actually pregnant for 2x 9 months except for the fact that I do own two very exquisite young ones! If I may say so myself. I am probably prejudiced but so what. I have earned the right to be.

I recently attended a function for moms with babies and I sort of stood out like a sore thumb with no baba in tow. It did give me time for a good look around though at all the beautiful, seemingly calm and completely in charge mommies in attendance. Looking back now I cannot think that I resembled this bunch of lovelies with their beautiful designer babies in designer gear in designer prams and whatnots, sporting the latest in baby wraps and baby accessories.

I was not that mom. I cannot lie. I was probably and still being the harassed mom of two, one that was colicky for the first 6 months of her existence and our time together. I never was and never will be that beautiful momma with the, to my eye, seemingly utterly composed and in perfect control. When my two were little, I was the mom skulking in the corner trying to hide the crazy look in my eyes from too little sleep and constantly feeling inadequate. I probably wasn’t that bad, looking at my two now, but I cringe when I look back and think how scattered brained I was, certainly never attended a tea for mommies with babies. There were no Momma’s and Babes Classes in our hood nor Mommy and me mornings, as far as I know. It was always me, myself, and I with two littlies.

Not that that puts a damper on my excitement over the babies arriving soon. I just find it more exciting, since soon I can play doll to my hearts delight, buy baby stuff, cute mini sizes of things, not having to worry about night feeds, colic, expensive scans, products, debilitating nappy prices, the ozone layer being damaged by same said nappies, the crying, the vomiting, and whatever other downside of having babies. I can only play, love, enjoy, and then kindly hand them back when my time is up!! What pleasure, what fun! Here’s your baba, and see you next  time!!

Much love

Kay

 

 

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